• @DaveA
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    17 days ago

    Haha I remember the days of downloading random EXEs off the internet and running them to see what they do (also the days of CD-rom drives).

    My auntie somehow managed to get a virus that played Für Elise through the motherboard speaker and never stopped so long as the thing was on. I don’t think they ever solved it, in the end they just got a new PC.

      • @DaveA
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        17 days ago

        Holy shit, TIL!

        • @[email protected]
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          2417 days ago

          When I read it, it stirred a distant memory of hearing such a story before, so I knew that there was something behind it and looked it up.

      • Kairos
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        4217 days ago

        Literally why would someone make that. That is completely indistinguishable as a signal.

        • @DaveA
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          6817 days ago

          I mean I guess you are supposed to take it to your computer repair shop and tell them it won’t stop playing Für Elise, and the shop is supposed to recognise it as a failure of CPU fan signal. If it just beeped a few times on startup then people would ignore it, and if it beeped constantly then well maybe Für Elise is nicer.

          • Kairos
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            17 days ago

            Huh yeah that’s MUCH better than throwing a post code and playing a beep during startup to signal something is wrong.

            • mox
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              2217 days ago

              Sadly, many motherboards don’t have POST code displays.

              • Kairos
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                717 days ago

                Hm. Well if the motherboard can play a song it can blast “<Type> Error” during startup to be infinitely more helpful.

                • @DaveA
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                  2217 days ago

                  I don’t think those speakers are capable of voice. They can handle a few different beep tones and that’s about it. The song was not like listening to Spotify, it was played using beep tones.

                  • @[email protected]
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                    316 days ago

                    I had an Athlon motherboard with voice POST messages… one night I woke up to it saying “your CPU has a problem!” over and over and was freaked out until I was completely awake and figure out what was wrong.

                    It wasn’t high quality coming through the piezo speaker, but it was good enough.

                  • @[email protected]
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                    213 days ago

                    I definitely remember short 2 or 3 second clips of relatively high quality music being played through our family’s IBM XT’s motherboard speaker at one point using a demo we got from a BBS or the Public Domain Software site in the mid-80s. It wasn’t easy but some madman made a proof-of-concept that did it and it was incredible at the time.

                  • Kairos
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                    17 days ago

                    Ohhhh right. Well its worth the <$1 of input costs.

        • @[email protected]
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          2217 days ago

          Computers in 97 didn’t need much in the way of cooling. A large passive heatsink was plenty for those CPUs. They’re not the 300+ watt behemoths we have today.

          • @[email protected]
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            17 days ago

            I really remember heatsinks being a thing on overclocked systems around that time frame and then once we got to P4 cpus the chilling towers appeared those things were massive

            • @[email protected]
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              1017 days ago

              The lower power 486s didn’t even need a heatsink. The P3 was the first to take a heasink resembling what we have today, but damn did the P4s need some serious cooling.

              It’s kinda funny how we think the 100 watts of a desktop P4 was insane when now the TDP of a high end laptop CPU is more than that.

              • Illecors
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                217 days ago

                It’s kinda funny how we think the 100 watts of a desktop P4 was insane when now the TDP of a high end laptop CPU is more than that.

                It really isn’t. Modern mobile cpus barely sip power.

                • mbfalzar
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                  17 days ago

                  PL2 on a 14900T is 106W

                  Edit: I’m an idiot, T series is low power socketed, not mobile. 14900HX has a TDP of 55W but boosts short term to 157W, which is still pretty ridiculous

                • I Cast Fist
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                  117 days ago

                  If you meant cell phones and tablets, that’s mostly due to the different architecture. RISC processors are super energy efficient, which also makes them much cooler to run.

                  x86-64 is a CISC architecture, which tends to be much more power hungry. There are only a couple of very low power Celeron CPUs that work under 10W of TDP, while that’s very common among phones’ CPUs.

                  • @[email protected]
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                    16 days ago

                    x86-64 is a CISC architecture

                    In many cases it’s actually RISC under the hood and uses an interpreter to translate the CISC commands and run them in the most optimal manner on the silicon

                    ARM and RISC-V absolutely scale up to multi-hundred watt server CPUs quite easily. Just look at the Ampere systems you can rent from various VPSes for example

                    The big benefit that ARM and RISC-V have is they have no established backwards compatibility to keep carrying technical debt forwards. ARM versions their instruction sets and software has to be released for given versions of ARM cores, and RISC-V is simply too new to have any significant technical debt on the instruction set side.

                    Atom cores were notable for focusing the architecture on some instructions then other instructions would be a slog to execute, so they were really good at certain things and for desktop use (especially in the extremely budget machines they got shoved into) they were painful. Much like how eCores are now. They’re very carefully architected for power efficiency, and do their jobs extremely well, but an all eCore CPU is a slog for desktop use in many cases

                • @[email protected]
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                  117 days ago

                  My 11950H (and all other “full power” Intel mobile CPUs) have a PL1 of >100 watts (109 for mine), and mine a PL2 of 139 watts. This laptop is about an inch thick.

                  Nothing about this laptop sips power, I’ve gotten as bad as 30 minutes of battery life out of a 90 watt hour battery not playing games.

          • @[email protected]
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            817 days ago

            I helped set up a friend’s “586” (about equivalent to a Pentium 1) and he had neglected to buy a heat sink or fan

            A hammer was a sufficient heat sink for the time it took to set up windows

        • @DaveA
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          417 days ago

          Super impressive since we used to play Quake 2 all day on it!

      • @[email protected]
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        16 days ago

        Can’t view this without cycling my VPN… We need a way to see reddit posts without visiting reddit. Is this a thing? Like… Piped for Reddit.

      • @[email protected]
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        115 days ago

        It explains that it means “fan failure”.

        And there was a link to a video of it happening.

        The only other link to an MS support page did not work.

    • @[email protected]
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      5417 days ago

      Drain.exe would say “water in drive a:, commencing spin cycle” then power up the drive and make a gurgling sound.

      Sheep.exe … would create a sheep that would wander the desktop.

      • Ms. ArmoredThirteen
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        3817 days ago

        Haha, in highschool I put sheep.exes into the school labs startup folders as a prank once. A couple days later the tech teacher approached me and was like “nobody’s in trouble but these things are a nightmare and if I have to reimage half the lab to get rid of them it would personally ruin my day”. Somehow all the sheep were gone by the next day

        • @[email protected]
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          2217 days ago

          School computers back then were a wild west. I remember having Starcraft on the school shared drive and playing it in homeroom.

          • @[email protected]
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            717 days ago

            I remember getting sent to the principals office for “hacking” (pinging the computer in the next room) in like 8th grade.

            Back in 4th/5th I actually was hacking, modifying our user menu to add Windows 3.1 and a password (copying config from a teacher’s profile). Also brute-forced at least two teachers passwords.

            I’m a network architect now, so there’s that.

          • Captain Aggravated
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            517 days ago

            I remember labs full of networked Win 98 machines in middle school, with like Novell software on them for login credentials and whatnot. The computers sat there with a login screen and when students logged into it you would be presented with the Office suite and a restricted web browser and some educational packages. A lot of normal Win 98 stuff wasn’t there though, like any settings menus. But there was some convoluted way where you could bring up a help text and then by navigating deep in the menu system somehow cause it to launch to a “normal” Win 98 desktop.

          • I Cast Fist
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            417 days ago

            I’d often bring a floppy with wolf3d or doom to deal with the boredom

      • @DaveA
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        1417 days ago

        Ah shit the sheep thing! In fact, there were others I can’t remember. And I seem to remember somewhere along the line they went from fun to spam things walking around your screen trying to make you buy shit or maybe they were trying to scam you, I can’t remember but they weren’t fun anymore, and hard to get rid of.

        • @[email protected]
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          917 days ago

          I remember an obscure one named “grommit” that was a dancing animated character and you’d click it to change arm and leg movements.

          Bonzi buddy was over of the bad ones, maybe?

          • @DaveA
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            17 days ago

            Bonzai buddy! Yes, that was one. Also I seem to recall naked women ones you couldn’t close.

            I don’t remember grommit, but also I failed to find anything when trying to search it up. It shares its name with too many things.

        • @[email protected]
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          317 days ago

          I had a cottonelle puppy so basically a toilet paper ad. But it’s not even sold in my country, we have other brands.

    • @[email protected]
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      1517 days ago

      There was also a program that would open the CD-ROM drive and play a raspberry noise at random intervals. It was a fun prank to set it to run at login.

      • @DaveA
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        4817 days ago

        Are you trying to make me feel old?

      • @[email protected]
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        3017 days ago

        Back in my day, that used to be the only way a computer could produce sound. Later on you could purchase a specialized sound card that would take up a slot in your motherboard.

        • Jay K
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          1617 days ago

          I thought I was the cool kid when I got my SoundBlaster 16!

          • @[email protected]
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            917 days ago

            The anticipation as you figure out a new IRQ and DMA configuration so you could play with your new toy

        • @[email protected]
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          617 days ago

          My dad used to disable the motherboard speaker because the noises games made back then were more annoying than fun. We eventually got a soundcard, and that was awesome.

        • @[email protected]
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          517 days ago

          And you could plug in your joystick into the soundcard, because where else would you put joystick, right? Perfectly logical.

      • @[email protected]
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        17 days ago

        They do, but it’s a very simple speaker that’s really more of a buzzer than what you might think of as a speaker.

        Many motherboards use a combination of beeps to report hardware errors if you fail on power on.

      • @[email protected]
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        417 days ago

        386 era machines often had a 4 inch speaker in the front panel. It couldn’t do much. Some main boards still come with headers for a speaker, some even come with an electret beeper

      • @[email protected]
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        117 days ago

        A good number do, but you won’t hear anything during normal operation. If your vomputer has ever beeped at you when you try to turn it on at 0% battery, accessed the bios, etc., there’s a good chance that was the motherboard speaker.

      • @[email protected]
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        110 days ago

        Slightly related, it is really annoying you cant stop the boot speaker on the PS4 without voiding your warranty and ripping the speaker out

    • dave@hal9000
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      316 days ago

      Lol the für Elise thing is funny. Back in highschool I got a “PC maintenance” credit which had me assigned as support in the computer lab. I made a batch script that ran on startup and showed a warning message saying the hard disk will self destruct and did a countdown from 10 with the motherboard speaker beeping down, fun times

      • @DaveA
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        216 days ago

        Haha evil! I love it!