when i was a child, i had a tendency to extremely hyper fixate on various topics for months, so now that i’m older it just feels like i’ve experienced everything even though I technically haven’t. the fixations are becoming much more quick in terms of cycles / how long they (don’t) last and i spend most of my time feeling bored and empty, just rotting away and feeling entertained by nothing. lately this has caused me to get really stuck in the past, so i spend a lot of time just laying in bed crate digging my own memories and feeling kind of depressed because i have nothing new to be excited by or interested in. it does not help that i don’t really have any long term goals or ambitions either, i just kind of exist.
does anyone else feel like this?
I wonder how much of this is influenced by society’s trends toward information consumerism. Things like short-form content and constant context-switching in media etc.
Not to say this is the whole picture, but for people predisposed to latch on to that sort of stuff I feel like there’s an exacerbation factor there.
It’s still a journey, but in my case, these are the things that have helped:
Volunteering - by far the thing that has helped the most. I volunteer as a teaching assistant helping refugees learn English, and it not only gets me out of the house, but I’ve met a lot of great people, and I feel like I’m really making a positive impact in the world. It’s also really easy, as far as volunteering goes - as a native speaker, I know English pretty well after all.
Medication seems to be helping in my case, though this one is the most “your mileage may vary”. I haven’t been taking it long, but it’s made a huge difference in my energy level and my bouts of executive dysfunction.
This one is going to sound weird, but (atheistic) spiritualism - in particular, Tarot. I’ve always been against spiritualism because it isn’t “science”, but lately I’ve been coming around to the idea that the way we think and feel about the world has just as much effect on our lives as anything else. I liked Tarot in particular because all it really is is a form of self-guided meditation. I don’t believe in any “supernatural” stuff personally, but the ritual of shuffling and laying out the cards is very calming, and the randomness of the cards forces you to see your issues from a perspective you may not have considered before. Of course, any form of meditation would likely do the exact same thing.
I should also mention that I’m generally in a very privileged situation (especially now - I wasn’t always quite so lucky), so I can’t deny that plays a large factor as well.