• Daft_ish@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    You have to ask, is our problem our reluctance to become monsters?

    I know the monster I become is drug addict nihalist who is constantly in and out of prison. Probably die from lung cancer in the next 5-10 years.

    The guilt of something like charismatic cult leader or disingenuous pastor would crush me. I’m too nervous/anxious to scam/con. Then my empathy is way too much to be an enforcer or offer dark web services.

    Nope, if I gave up, I’m the guy they point at and say, “don’t do drugs kids.”

        • AFallingAnvil@lemmy.ca
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          4 months ago

          The world is better with you in it, I hope you can find some people that make you want to stick around and be with them as long as you can.

          I definitely get despair when I think about the future, but I also want to just exist around my friends and loved ones. Their company is my motivation these days, and not hurting them or letting them down is enough reason to keep trying to make something of myself.

          It’s not easy, but I’ve found it worth it. Making them happy makes me happier, and makes me feel like I’m doing something right.

          Take care friend, I’m rooting for you.